Are you a Dave Bennett or an OJ

Long long ago, in the year of 1995, I went to the prom with Dave Bennett. The situation that lead us to go to the prom together was a little odd, and we definitely went "as just friends." My family, well mostly my grandma, got a little too excited that their little Catherine was going on a date. My grandma was sure I was not only dating Dave Bennett, but that we were in love. I think it broke her heart when I revealed that we weren't in love. She was very upset and she told me that I could either marry someone like Dave Bennett or I could marry someone like OJ Simpson (this was right after he murdered his wife, not when he was a popular athlete/actor). That idea has made me giggle for years. It makes me giggle because there is such a big range between marrying the preppiest, politest guy ever and marrying a murderous ex-athlete.

I was talking to the hubby last night and we decided that he was somewhere in between OJ and Dave Bennett. We decided that there should be a questionaire you can take to tell you what degree of Dave Bennett you are. I don't know how to set up Facebook Quizzes, so here are the questions, you will have to grade it yourself.

1. You killed your wife, how did you do it?

a. With kindness and a cheerful attitude
b. With a knife.

2. How did your sports career end?

a. From Pnenomia after T-Ball.
b. From injuries after a long professional career.

3. What kind of pants would you wear with a cream sweater vest with red trim?

a. Red Chordaroy.
b. Black Leather.

4. How do you feel about the naked gun movies?

a. Hilarious.
b. Great Acting.

5. How do you decorate your home?

a. With tasteful modern art pieces placed in a very artistic way.
b. With stolen sports memorabilia.

6. How did you wear your hair when you were young?

a. With a lovely wave in the front. Not quite flock of seagulls, but close.
b. Afro.

7. Are you a neat freak?
a. Yes.
b. No, I leave my bloody leather gloves everywhere.

If all your answers are A, you are 100% Dave Bennett. Maybe my grandma was right. Maybe there are only two types of men in the world. Or maybe you are Dave Bennett and you found my blog. In that case, hi Dave, how are you doing? Tell Carri and the girls I said HI!

If your answers contained 1-2 Bs you are 71% Dave Bennett. Sure, my grandma would think you were a good catch, but she probably wishes you were just a little bit more Bennett.

If your answers contained 3-4 Bs you are 50% Dave Bennett. You seem like a good guy, but a girl never know when you are going to flip out and be violent.

If your answers contained 5-6 Bs you are 29% Dave Bennett. You might have lovely fashion sense and a nice sense of style, but deep down you are a cold blooded killer.

If your answers were all Bs you ARE an OJ Simpson. You have NO chance of impressing my grandma.

What type of person are you?

ps: For those of you who don't know Dave Bennett from GBHS, U of M Flint, or from being my friend Carri's husband, shame on you. How could you not know Dave Bennett. Anyway, he is a buddy of mine who is a wonderful person and is the exact opposite of OJ Simpson.

Is this a garden blog?

I hate gardening. I hate almost everything about it. I hate dirt, I hate bugs, I hate sweating, and I exponentially hate sweating while digging in dirt while bugs attack me.

At the beginning of the summer, my yard looked like the picture below. If the neighborhood association asks, I don't know what happened to the tree that used to be where the pile of dirt is now. And, if I knew what tree they were talking about, I am sure it died through the winter. Anyway, this isn't about the tree that may or may not have ever been there. When the picture below was taken, I had already done more gardening than I wanted to. I had trimmed the bushes and pulled up weeds and dumped a lot of dirt. Last year I thought I was taking the easy way out, and I planted annuals. That was dumb, because that meant this year I was back to square one and had to plant something.



I have a lot of friends who are really into gardening and landscaping. I do not have lofty goals of having a beautiful yard like theirs. I have realistic lazy goals about being just above the worst yard on the street. I should have taken a picture of the other houses, because the bar has been set very low.

Well, I finally did my gardening, and I must admit, I didn't hate every part of it. I like that my house has color in front of it. I like the beautiful flowers. I like not having to feel guilty about picking the beautiful flowers because it is my yard and I can do what I want.


I did not make the annual mistake this year. I was saved from that mistake by some wonderful helpers. My friend Michele at work brought in some flowers from her garden for me. She was sure to bring in the perreniels that need very little attention but spread like crazy. My friend Nikki gave me some of her prize daylillies. I really like the daylillies because you are supposed to pick them because they only last one day. And best of all, I have little Chazzy-chazz to help me water the flowers.

So, FINE I will admit that there are a few positive things about gardening. Geesh!

Looking for topics

Cougar cousins: Amy, Supermodel bride to be Robin, Susan, me,
Sarah, Megan, Angela, Tami. There were a few non cougars that joined us,
but they are not pictured here.

This weekend while I was camping out with my cousins, my cousin Susan mentioned that she wanted me to make sure I blogged about the weekend. In response to her request, I decided that I should take down notes about interesting things that happened. I only ended up with one note:

When my sister was done with her meal at the restaurant, she got out her Nelgene bottle and poured her ice water into it. She said it was good water and she wanted to take it with her.

Looking back, I think it is a good sign that I didn't write down more. I was having too much fun to take down good notes. My family attends the same campout twice a year and it is always a wonderful time. This time was a little different though.

My cousin Robin is getting married in September, and we decided that all the girl cousins should take her out to dinner kind of as a batchelorette party. I have to say "kind of" because poor Robin is one of the younger ones in the crowd and the older half of the crowd wasn't up for crazy parties anymore. We did make an attempt. We all dressed up in our coolest clothes and looked like a lovely bunch of cougars out on the prowl. Perhaps we would have been very popular at a dance club.

When we got to the restaurant, we had to wait an hour before being seated. My sister Amy is really good with games and came up with a game where we would all write two facts about Robin. One would be true and one would be false. After we all wrote them down, they were read aloud. It was hilarious, but I felt kind of bad for Robin. The true comments mostly fell into three categories, an embarrassing childhood crush, embarrassing accidental childhood nudity, and ice cream. No one mentioned how Robin is really good at sports, that she is always nice about getting people treats from the dessert tent, or how quickly she picked up playing "part of your world" on the piano. No one remembered that she is the star of the family volleyball team.

The next day we were all talking about what would come up if we played the game about other family members. One cousin had a boob pop out of her bathing suit, another two had childhood mullets, and another accidentally peed on someone.

It got me thinking, that I don't know what mine would be. What would they say if they played the game about me? I am not fishing for stories here, I am just wondering if I don't have any moments like this, or if, in MY head, they just run together with the rest of my life.

What do you think?

PS: If you want to share a story, I would love it. I just don't want you to think I am begging for one.

Baby Mama Drama

Yesterday I met my friend Carri for dinner. Carri is my good friend from college and we don't get together as often as we should. We especially don't get together very often since we both had babies a few days apart.

After our dinner yesterday, I think I know why. I think Carri is the real mother of little Chazz.

I am not suggesting that our children got switched at birth, I am suggesting that Carri had a torrid affair with my husband and they are trying to pass their love child off as mine. It happens all the time, just watch Jerry Springer.

Here are the clues, draw your own conclusions:

• Everyone says that Charles has his daddy's face and my coloring. HOWEVER, he does not REALLY have my coloring. He is pale like me, but he has RED hair like Carri. Sure, red hair runs in my family but I do not have red hair. ALSO, Carri and I look enough a like that I was once mistaken for her daughter while we were at the mall.
  
• Charles took to Carri as soon as I sat him down. Carri beat me to the restaurant, so she was already sitting down with her food. I put charles in a high chair next to her while I went to get my food. Normally, this would not have worked out. Normally Charles would have cried and wanted his mommy. BUT, he didn't, because he was happy to finally be sitting next to his real mommy.
  
• Charles actually agreed to show off for Carri. I am always trying to get him to do his tricks for people, and he never will. He did all of them for carri. They include vibrating his lips, waving, and saying hi.
  
• When we left and parted ways, Charles couldn't take his eyes off of Carri. He watched her walk all the way to her car on the other side of the parking lot.

Why did I never suspect anything before? Well, ever since they met, Carri and my husband have disliked eachother. Now I am thinking that their passion against eachother flipped into a passion for eachother. The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference. Hatred and love are very closely related.

DNA test here we come.